Why Males Should Embrace The Feminine Principle

“The feminine principle is an archetypal energetic expression alive in both men and women and in every aspect of creation. It represents the very energy of creation itself, the creative force from which all things are born.”

                                                                              M. Montealegre

Maleness and femaleness are like two substances that blend, but with neither element ever disappearing in one individual. These feminine and masculine “principles” are of corresponding value in both men and women, but distributed differently in each person (some individuals are more male, others more female). While the feminine principle (not necessarily identical to femininity) is strong, rather than being cherished and encouraged, it has generated fear and been the object of persecution for as long as human history. The male need for power suppresses, ignores, and distorts our feminine side. Emotionally, psychologically, and culturally, we have all been living under a paternal social order.  Over the years, we have associated specific characteristics with maleness and femaleness to the point of exclusivity. We associate maleness with authority, and femaleness with meekness. What is unrecognized is that similar to the yin and yang of Chinese philosophy, maleness exists in the female and femaleness in the male. We are blends of both.

And yet, the faulty thinking persists. We perceive the energy of the mother, as it embodies the qualities of love, compassion, intuition, receptiveness, openness and vulnerability as feminine. As if it cannot exist in a male. In Jungian psychology, they see the self as the ‘being’ aspect of personality and as the feminine principle, while the ego represents ‘doing’, the masculine principle. From this perspective, a “normal” psyche is one in which neither ego nor self dominates but shows mutual interdependence, interplay, and synergy from the interaction.

Since the Age of Reason (1685-1815), logic and the intellect, characteristics associated with the male principle, have held sway as the essence of human values. This contradicted the emotional and intuitive aspects of beingness, the female principle. To our own detriment, favoring one excluded the other. But full human capabilities include both. Fortunately, this recognition is changing, although slowly. Nowadays, more and more people realize that intellectual logic by itself cannot be the sole basis for our reality. We recognize that integration of reason and the intellect with intuition and heart is no longer an option but a necessity if humanity is to survive. There is, then, a rising energy, an ascendency, in the feminine principle. Similar to a small flame in a hailstorm, it has not disappeared and deserves protection, encouragement, and room to grow.

The feminine principle is not original to our age, but is ascendant in a way that is modern and hopeful. We are beginning to recognize the privileged and unique position of femaleness in our mythologies, histories and evolution. Just a few examples: In the Book of Genesis, Eve showed the courage to make the choice to obtain the knowledge of good and evil over obedience. It’s a remarkable act symbolizing the darker side of the feminine. Choosing the forbidden fruit resulted in both male and female being exiled from Eden, but it was the female who opened our eyes to knowledge and wisdom. In evolution, sexual selection is a misunderstood and misrepresented concept more than any other idea in evolutionary biology. Overwhelming evidence supports the notion that females “choose” mates, while males “compete” to be the chosen. The feminine once again holds the power of choice. In most mammals, the Y chromosome determines the sex. Without this chromosome, femaleness is the default. During development, women control raising of the young and teach us most of what we need to know before we enter school. This continues in public schools, where women make up to 80% of the teachers.

There are benefits to this recognition and reintegration of the feminine principle. Opening up to it can take many forms and expressions. On the positive end, it results in freeing our emotions, allowing us to be vulnerable, opening our hearts with compassion for others, guiding us toward service for the greater community. We become more receptive, intuitive and creative. It frees us from our inhibitions, and from the mental constructs of who we are. Allowing the principle to flow freely opens up a connection to the source of life, to the ever-flowing stream in the universe, to God, Buddha-nature, or being. 

In Singing Woman: Voices of the Sacred Feminine, Elizabeth Eiler has written, “This is the age of the ascendant Feminine Principle. In such times as these, women are able to look at themselves with new concepts of value and brilliance. However you inhabit and express being Woman, embrace yourself in that way today!” This rallying cry holds for men as it does for women. Likewise, Albert Einstein said, “The intuitive mind is a sacred gift, and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.” Recognizing that our bodies blend feminine and masculine aspects and being receptive to this principle is the answer to many of the problems and imbalances we produce. Acknowledging and freeing the inner feminine gives way to the love in us. And it returns us to the sacred and original mind once obscured by ego, in a manner that brings unity and reconciliation to all.

Living Up to the Greatest Commandment

Jews and Christians are under ethical, religious, and spiritual obligations to follow Biblical precepts. The Ten Commandments, known also as “the ten words” or as the Decalogue in Christianity, are principles to guide our behavior. The commandments, detailed in Exodus 20:1-17 from the King James Version, describe a relationship with God, e.g., “Thou shalt have no other gods before me; do not make unto thee any graven image; do not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain.” The remaining commandments describe specific actions that characterize exemplary behavior, e.g., “Thou shalt remember the sabbath; keep it holy; honor thy father and mother; do not murder, commit adultery, steal, bear false witness against thy neighbor, or covet thy neighbor’s house, wife, slaves, etc.”

In Christian theology, Jesus freed his followers from the obligation to follow the hundreds of commandments in Jewish religious law. He did not, however, remove the duty to keep the Ten Commandments. In Matthew 22:35–40, Mark 12:28–34, and Luke 10:27, Jesus acknowledges their validity. He then asks his disciples to go further, demanding a righteousness exceeding that in the Old Testament. When asked, “which is the great commandment in the law?” Jesus answered, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

Jesus considered these as similar precepts, for if we love God with all our heart, soul and mind, loving our neighbor is the natural consequence. For the Christian faithful, it is the core of their lifestyle and values. But why is it so difficult to live this reality? One cynical reason is that no sanction is associated with their lack of execution. Thus, individuals can call themselves Christian, not follow the commandments, and have no fear of their misbehavior. Even if they believe that punishment can only occur following earthly life, it is easy to ignore. The association is so far removed that it will not weigh very much on their conscience. My intuition is that these are not the “virtuous” people God is hoping to shape.

So, can people call themselves Christian if they cannot live up to these commandments? Yes, but it matters whether they try as opposed to having an uninterested and lackadaisical mindset about it. God gave many hints He wants his followers to make the effort. The most perfect expression of this expectation is Matthew 7:7, “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.”  If we assume that those who see themselves as Christian do struggle, then what prevents them from complying? Let’s for now ignore the first part and focus on the latter part of the commandment.

First, God would not command “love your neighbor as yourself” if it were beyond the capacity of humans. Second, God is the source of Life. When the faithful love Him with all their heart, soul, mind and strength, they grow to recognize that everyone is part of His creation. My intuition is that most of the faithful know and exercise this understanding intentionally as well as unconsciously. They show it in the tithes they give, the charity work they do for their churches, and the individual volunteering seen across the world. But when they do not identify with others, it means there will be moments their actions dissociate from this ideal. What gets in the way? I argue it is the nature of human individuality in relation to unity.

This argument resembles that proposed by Martin Buber, an Austrian-born philosopher, who considered the distinction between I–Thou and I–It relation. In his analysis, Buber attempted to understand how human individuality fits into the universality of God. His reasoning followed that “I either understand myself as God or God as myself.” Neither of those, however, appeared to be correct or satisfactory. And thus, the need for a third alternative. Jesus, who became Christ, is a perfect and symbolic representation of this third relationship. Or what Buber characterized as “I am in God and God is in me” relationship. I keep my individuality as I recognize I am also part of the whole. Jesus as a human being is the embodiment of such an interactivity. Christ is the actuality that such consciousness is a possibility available to everyone.

As long as we see the world from an individual perspective, self-centered actions will prevail. When we perceive ourselves as embedded in the “I am in God and God is in me” relationship, then others become as important. And actions follow that perspective. This relationship thrives when fostered, learned, prayed for, and exercised. When that awareness becomes a natural response, then living up to the greatest commandment develops into a real and effortless life.

What can be done to make this awareness a natural response? Make the following exercises a part of an everyday routine. This will promote learning to “love your neighbor as yourself” and set up an “I am in God and God is in me” relationship:

For more thoughts on this issue, check this blog for future essays.